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Train up a child

BENTON HEISLER
Director of Connectional Ministries, WMC

“If you make my Word your home, you will indeed be my disciples.  You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.”  (John 8:13 New Jerusalem Bible)

BentonIf you have been reading previous articles, you understand that this verse guides the focus of my monthly writings.  I just finished composing the eulogy I will share this week at the memorial service of a 95 year old life-long family friend. His family has farmed for six generations in the same community.

Our family moved from that community when was just ten.  But a part of that community never left our family. Early childhood development resources identify that first decade of life as the “formative years.”   Families’ roots go deep like the maples that line a driveway. With each generation’s season, the branches reach higher, with each whirligig seed that travels in the wind, the influence of Faith, Family and Friends is spread far beyond measure.

Geography and time creates space in our relationships, but the love found and formed by Faith, Family and Friends bridges such chasms.

As prepared to write that eulogy I kept asking myself, “What was it about those early years that was so profound that it shaped the nearly 50 that have followed?”  The answer is easily found in the trilogy of Faith/Family/Friends.  The writer of Proverbs was indeed accurate, “Train up a child in the way they shall go, and when they are old they will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).”

My first decade was significantly different than children encounter today.   I recall a common prayer we recited before we headed to the lunch room.  We sang Christmas carols as part of the “School Christmas Program” and there was no big discussion about who could say what “that was politically correct” at the Baccalaureate Service for the graduating class.

I do not live under a rock wishing for or imagining that we will ever return to such a day.  The world has changed.  Supreme Court Rulings regarding separation of Church & State, the ease of international travel, the vast forms of electronic instant world-wide communication and our understanding of the religions of other cultures have all contributed to this paradigm shift.  What I am reminded of is the reality that, unlike my formative years in the late 50’s and early ‘60’s, the Christian Church can no longer expect the culture, the Church or the State to “train up the child in Biblical way they should go.”

This is clearly not a new revelation.  This is in fact “old news”, but I believe there are times we have failed to fully comprehend the implications. Listening to our conversation as three of the six generations sat together telling stories of the past, I reminded myself of each generation’s responsibility to maintain the legacy of faith, lest we become like the Israelites.   Judges 2: 10 & 11 records, “After that a whole generation had been gathered to their fathers; another generation grew up who knew neither the Lord nor what the Lord had done for Israel and they did evil in the sight of the Lord.”

The consequences don’t seem good for our failure to pass along the stories of faith to the next generation!  How will they learn of the importance and blessing of tithing (Malachi 3:10)?  Who will teach them the powerful images from Jesus in the “Sermon on the Mount” (Matthew 5) or the “Golden Rule” (Matthew 7:12) and “The Great Commandment” Mathew 28:19 & 20.  Is it a wonder there is so much violence when we have failed to live by Jesus admonition to “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you (Matthew 5:44)?”  Have we forgotten the power for healing that comes simply through the name of Jesus (Mark 11:24; Luke 6:19, James 5:14-15)?

As I travel to this childhood city this week there will be many moments to recall.  I will go past the cemetery where my parents, brother and grandmother are buried; the elementary school where I first learned to read; the original sanctuary where I served as an acolyte (in that cute white frock they had us wear! LOL) has been removed and a new sanctuary now is in its space.  But I vividly recall the day I raised my hand as I responded to the pastor’s invitation, “Is there someone here who feels they would like to give their heart to Jesus today.”  Don’t remember what he said that must have motivated me.  (I have come to learn that theologians call it “prevenient grace.”)  But I do know that it has made all the difference in my life.

I will drive down the street where “Aunt Peggy” lived.  (She was the widow of a former pastor and my mom’s spiritual mentor.)  I first went to her with my new Bible given to third graders.

“Where should I start?”  I recall asking her.

“I suggest you go to I Corinthians 13.  It is known as the Love Chapter”, she said.

I pray there has been an “Aunt Peggy” in your life and/or you are that spiritual mentor for another young life in their formative years.  Next time I hold my seven-month-old grandson, I think I will be sure we read I Corinthians 13 “… for the greatest of these is Love.”

Last Updated on January 30, 2024

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The Michigan Conference