In this month’s blog, Drinking the Cup, Rev. John Boley reflects that life is more than getting what we deserve.
REV. JOHN W. BOLEY
Assistant to Bishop, Michigan Area
As many of you know, our daughter Hannah has Cystic Fibrosis, a genetic, progressive disease. A couple of weeks ago she got hit hard by a case of pneumonia and is now at UM Hospital in the CVC ICU.
The support we have received from the United Methodist connection is amazing. Members from the congregations we have served, clergy colleagues, Area and Conference staff, and so many others, have all thrown their love and prayers, and so much more, in our direction and it has been so great that words cannot capture it or offer enough thanks.
We have also seen the tremendous talents, resources and dedication of the UM Hospital staff as they are engaging in life saving efforts for Hannah and for so many others. It is overwhelming. People caring for people they don’t even know is as powerful a witness as there is and is the essence of Christ’s compassion. (Luke 10, Parable of the Good Samaritan).
One of the things that so many people have mentioned to us is that it is not fair that Hannah has Cystic Fibrosis and has to go through this. Some have said that there is just no justice in the world.
Yes, it is not fair that Hannah was born with Cystic Fibrosis. It is not fair that she contracted this aggressive pneumonia just after she had earned a Nursing Degree from U of M and started working as a nurse at UM Hospital. It is not fair that children suffer in this world. It is not fair that Hannah got this disease and her two older brothers dodged this genetic bullet. It is not fair that Hannah’s future is in doubt when she has so much to offer.
But it is also not fair that Hannah is in UM Hospital and others don’t have access to the best health care. It is not fair that Hannah was born into a family that adores her and other children are born into this world unloved. It is not fair that Hannah was born into a family that guaranteed she would go to college and other children don’t even come close to these opportunities. It is not fair that Hannah has had a good life so far while other Cystic Fibrosis kids have not fared nearly as well.
All of this discussion reminds me of an article I read in The Christian Century way back in the 1990’s. I saved that article and recently found it in all of my stuff (miracles still happen). It is called “The Life and Death We Don’t Deserve,” written by Gerald L. Sittser, a professor at Whitworth College in Spokane, Washington. Professor Sittser’s mother, wife and daughter were all tragically killed in a automobile accident. Sittser asked all of these same questions about fairness and justice. He asked, “Why me? Why them?” He wrestled with his anger, his lack of control, and, as a Professor of History, with the magnitude of suffering in the world. He wrestled with his rage at watching the driver who killed his family pronounced not guilty at trial.
Over time, Sittser began pondering the assumption of why he was entitled to complete fairness. He reflected, “I did not deserve to lose three members of my family. But then again, I am not sure I deserved to have them in the first place. … Perhaps I did not deserve their deaths, but I did not deserve their presence in my life either.” He began understanding that grace and fairness are different. And he began to understand that in a world of complete fairness, there would be no room for grace. Grace, by definition, is undeserved. Fairness, by definition, is perfect cause and effect of punishments and rewards.
Sittser slowly understood the working of grace in his life and then the God that he knew only partially became a living reality in his life. Here is how he concluded his wonderful article:
“Grace is transforming me, and it is wonderful. I have slowly learned where God belongs and have allowed him to assume that place – at the center of life rather than at the periphery. So, God, spare us a life of fairness! o live in a world with grace is better by far than to live in a world of absolute fairness. A fair world might make life nice for us, but only as nice as we are. We might get what we deserve, but I wonder how much that is and whether or not we would really be satisfied. A world with grace will give us more than we deserve. It will give us life, even in our suffering.”
The love and prayers we have received from everyone would not be possible without the Grace of God. The dedication and caring of the UM Hospital staff would not be possible without the Grace of God. The whole UM Hospital would not even exist without God’s constant infusion of Grace which calls us to care for more than ourselves. We don’t ask why Hannah has Cystic Fibrosis. We only ask to cope with dignity, and with love and respect for all.
We are with Professor Sittser. So, God, spare us a life of fairness. Give us a life of Grace! Amen.
Last Updated on October 19, 2016